The Window View

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window.

The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation. And every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his room-mate all the things he could see outside the window.

The man in the other bed began to live for those one-hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside. The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color of the rainbow. Grand old trees graced the landscape, and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.

Then unexpectedly, a sinister thought entered his mind. Why should the other man alone experience all the pleasures of seeing everything while he himself never got to see anything? It didn't seem fair. At first thought the man felt ashamed. But as the days passed and he missed seeing more sights, his envy eroded into resentment and soon turned him sour. He began to brood and he found himself unable to sleep. He should be by that window - that thought, and only that thought now controlled his life.

Late one night as he lay staring at the ceiling, the man by the window began to cough. He was choking on the fluid in his lungs. The other man watched in the dimly lit room as the struggling man by the window groped for the button to call for help. Listening from across the room he never moved, never pushed his own button which would have brought the nurse running in. In less than five minutes the coughing and choking stopped, along with that the sound of breathing. Now there was only silence-deathly silence.

The following morning the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths. When she found the lifeless body of the man by the window, she was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take it away. As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the world outside. Finally, he would have the joy of seeing it all himself. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed. It faced a blank wall.

The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window.

The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall. She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you."
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Moral of the story is... There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations. Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled.

If you want to feel rich, just count all of the things you have that money can't buy.
As blessed as you are, always remember that there are people less fortunate than you. While it is not an obligation to help anyone, you don't lose anything by sharing some love. Happiness shared is doubled, remember?

The Downside Of Being a Migratory Nomad Bird

Report From a Friend (actually dad's friend's daughter, meh gambled with her during one CNY when i was 11 or so) who has migrated to London :

http://areshaonline.com/the-downside-of-being-a-migratory-bird/

Disclaimer: This is a reflective post written in 150% honesty if you care about this sort of font type. Sometimes it’s just good to type out your thoughts. Because that’s what writing should be about.

Today I had an interesting whatsapp conversation with Boggy. Boggy and I have been brothers from other mothers since we met in secondary school at the useless age of 13.

We went to the same kindergarten together but only really became friends when we met as teenagers. I guess this brings some truth to the theory of meeting the right person at the right time/juncture in your life for it all to make sense.

And then it led me to think about how, despite the fact that we’ve been buddies for the last 15 years, we’ve communicated for a long time on Whatsapp and Facebook. Something I find extremely limiting because there’s nothing better than just meeting up in person and talking a whole load of comforting, familiar psychobabble.

99% of my friendships and family relationships exists via the help of the internet because:

I haven’t spent more than 3 years in a single country in the last 9 years of my life.

It’s a pretty scary thing to be so far away from the few who love you back. Not to mention how incredibly frustrating it is to make new friends the older you get. You often feel like a square peg in a room of happy round holes, or like a misunderstood retard ‘ad break’ -interjecting in the comforting, familiar psychobabble that others are having happily without you in it.

The weird thing is that I’ve learnt to exist in perpetual transit while struggling to keep the emotional ties I’ve made with people dotted all around the world. Most of which are ties which aren’t strong enough to make much worthwhile sense of an ‘online’ friendship.

I sometimes feel I exist somewhere between yesterday and today, neither here nor there.

And like a submarine I vanish hiding in the psychological and physical distance of the deep blue sea. Resurfacing sporadically only to realize that a lot has changed while you were off  exploring marine life… a choice you made because the cards you got dealt weren’t royal flush and you’re not exactly great at holding a poker face.

I’ve also been feeling the strain of not being able to communicate with my brother (with autism) at the drop of a hat via mobile or the internet since he got relocated to a care home in 2011. It was the best thing to happen to him, but it’s driven an emotional wedge that I have to work extra hard at breaking down with an ice axe every time I make a pit stop back in Singapore.

It’s a real mindpuzzle trying to make sense of all of this…not really knowing the beginning or the end of this journey to ‘be’ the best you can at playing the poker game of life.

I have found such a good place to be at work-wise, London is such a creatively inspiring and challenging place, I have two lovely pet cats and the best pet boy ever.

But there’s this other half of the picture that doesn’t exist in ‘transit’ that I have yet to fully comprehend.

Do you?


-Aresha
Long stories of a singaporean quitter attempting to become foreign talent... in London.

10 Common Misconceptions About Money

10 Common Misconceptions About Money
By Stacy Johnson


I recently celebrated my 57th birthday, and have arrived at a common conclusion about getting older: It sucks. But there’s one good thing that comes with age – the wisdom that can only come from experience.
Experience helps you understand how life actually works, and how
remarkably different life is from the kind you so often see portrayed
in commercials, movies, and daydreams.
Prime example? Money. The myths surrounding money are numerous and widely held, especially among the young.
It’s a shame, because pursuing myths will lead you astray, waste your time and, taken to extremes, ruin your life.
Here are 10 popular misconceptions about money that experience has taught me are more often fiction than fact…

1. The more money I have, the happier I’ll be.

Let’s ask Howard Hughes, Anna Nicole Smith, John Belushi, Chris
Farley, Marilyn Monroe, Michael Jackson, Amy Winehouse, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain, and Elvis about this one. OK, guys, show of hands… did fame and fortune make you happy?
Happiness comes from liking yourself, something completely unrelated to money. Riches buys recognition, too often confused with validation.
But respect, especially self-respect, isn’t for sale.
When you’re on your death-bed, will you be thinking about money? If so, your contribution to the gene pool was negligible. Rather than obsessing about money, think about what really makes you happy. Then make only enough money to take part in those activities. Making more is a waste of the only non-renewable resource you have: your time on the planet.

2. A big income will keep me out of debt.

What’s the difference between someone who makes $50,000 a year with a $100,000 mortgage and someone who makes $500,000 a year with a $1million mortgage? Answer: nothing. Unless they have money set aside for emergencies, they’re both a paycheck away from disaster.
Debt often rises with income. What keeps you out of debt isn’t a high
income or net worth. It’s not borrowing money.

3. Millionaires drive fancy cars, wear fancy clothes, and live in fancy houses.

Not according to the folks who did a bunch of research and wrote The Millionaire Next Door. According to their studies, the average
American millionaire drives an unexciting American car, lives in the
same nondescript house they’ve owned for years, and avoids designer labels. That’s how they became millionaires.
So who’s buying all the designer clothes and Porches?
Many times it’s people who will never become wealthy because they’re swapping tomorrow’s financial freedom for today’s appearance. As I’m fond of saying, life affords you the opportunity to either look rich or be rich, but few live long enough to accomplish both.
The younger you decide, the better.

4. The more money I have, the less worries I’ll have.

Balderdash. Money doesn’t end anxiety. It gives you something else to be anxious about: losing your money.
Granted, those without enough money to eat or keep a roof over their heads have lots to worry about.
But once you have enough money for all your needs and a reasonable number of your desires, the excess will add to your concerns, not alleviate them.

5. Money will help me find love.

In my experience with women, they’re not attracted to money. They are, however, attracted to ambition and intelligence, especially when it presents as humour.
Everyone’s attracted to people who are self-confident, non-needy, and able to laugh at themselves.
Like a peacock, wealthy people can easily attract attention.
But attention isn’t the same as admiration or affection.
And even if it works, do you really want to spend your life with someone so shallow and insecure they were attracted to your money?

6. I’ll have more fun if I have more money.

When I was young, I didn’t have two nickels to rub together, but I had a ton of fun. Today I have lots of nickels – and am happy to report, still having a riot.
There’s no doubt that money can furnish the elements of a good time.
But if you need money to have fun, you’re boring.
And should you become a billionaire, you’ll still be boring.

7. Money means security.

When you boil it down, a primary purpose of money is to make life more predictable. It allows you to control your environment by being prepared for the unexpected.
While that’s partly true, there’s not enough money in the world to
completely control everything. I could have a heart attack and die
before I finish writing this, and you could have one before you finish reading it. Accept that we’re all bobbing on a sea of uncertainty, no matter how much money we have.

8. Money will enable me to meet interesting people.

In my experience, you can’t swing a dead cat without hitting
interesting people. But if I want to maximize my odds of meeting
someone worth knowing, I won’t be heading to the nearest country club.
I’ve met plenty of fun and interesting rich people – but I’ve also met
rich people who were vain, myopic, pretentious, and judgmental. They weren’t that way because they were rich. They were that way because they were born rich and as a result never had to overcome adversity.
Overcoming adversity is what makes people interesting, not how much money they have. People without at least a few skeletons in the closet are often shallow as a puddle.

9. I need money to travel, and travel is important.

The world is an interesting place, and being well-travelled makes you interesting. But travel comes in many forms, including the budget variety. If you want to see faraway places, you’ll find a way.
In my book Life or Debt, I conclude by describing the first book I
ever read about something I love: sailing.
The book was about a couple who built their own sailboat and travelled around the world, working when they needed to and never accumulating more than a few thousand dollars at a time. Their boat had no air conditioning, no refrigerator
– not even a radio.
What most people do in the same situation is wait until they have
enough money to buy what amounts to a floating condo: a boat that’s luxurious, seaworthy, and far too expensive to ever actually buy. The result is they spend their lives on the dock. What a waste.

10. Money will buy friends.

This is not only untrue, it’s the opposite of what money actually
does. I’ve got a super-rich friend or two, and what I’ve observed is
that money attracts plenty of hangers-on – but almost no friends.
People with vast wealth or fame can’t trust the motives of those
surrounding them (see No. 5 above). That’s why the people they count as true friends are normally either people they knew before they were rich and famous, or people who are equally rich and famous.
There’s the advantage of being judged on your personality versus your net worth: The friends that result actually like you, not what you can do for them.

"How happy a man is, is not how much he has but how little he needs."

Mark Twain once said, “Always tell the truth. That way, you don't have to remember what you said.”

The 4 Wives.

Once upon a time there was a rich King who had four wives. He loved the 4th wife the most and adorned her with rich robes and treated her to the finest of delicacies. He gave her nothing but the best. He also loved the 3rd wife very much and was always showing her off to neighboring kingdoms. However, he feared that one day she would leave him for another. He also loved his 2nd wife. She was his confidant, and was always kind, considerate and patient with him. Whenever the King faced a problem, he could confide in her, and she would help him get through the difficult times.

The King’s 1st wife was a very loyal partner and had made great contributions in maintaining his wealth and kingdom. However, he did not love the first wife. Although she loved him deeply, he hardly took notice of her! One day, the King fell ill and he knew his time was short. He thought of his luxurious life and wondered, "I ! now have four wives with me, but when I die, I’ll be all alone."Thus, he asked the 4th wife, "I have loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I’m dying, will you follow me and keep me company?"

"No way!", replied the 4th wife, and she walked away without another word. Her answer cut like a sharp knife right into his heart.

The sad King then asked the 3rd wife, "I have loved you all my life. Now that I’m dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No!", replied the 3rd wife. "Life is too good! When you die, I’m going to remarry!" His heart sank and turned cold.

He then asked the 2nd wife, "I have always turned to you for help and you’ve always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?" "I’m sorry, I can’t help you out this time!", replied the 2nd wife. "At the very most, I can only send you to your grave." Her answer came like a bolt of lightning, and the King was devastated.

Then a voice called out: "I’ll leave with you and follow you no matter where you go." The King looked up, and there was his first wife. She was so skinny as she suffered from malnutrition and neglect. Greatly grieved, the King said, "I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance!"

In truth, we all have 4 wives in our lives: Our 4th wife is our body. No matter how much time and effort we lavish in making it look good, it will leave us when we die.

Our 3rd wife is our possessions, status and wealth. When we die, it will all go to others.

Our 2nd wife is our family and friends. No matter how much they have been there for us, the furthest they can stay by us is up to the grave.

And our 1st wife is our Soul. Often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power and pleasures of the world. However, our Soul is the only thing that will follow us wherever we go.

Repost: A letter to prime minister Lee Hsien Loong

Subject:  Re: Maidin Packer -- A LETTER TO PRIME MINISTER LEE HSIEN LOONG

Date: Sat, 8 Sep 2012 11:17:05 +0800

Please note that the writer, Mr Mohd Maidin bin Packer, is an EX- MP.

A LETTER TO PRIME MINISTER LEE HSIEN LOONG

by Maidin Packer on Thursday, September 6, 2012 at 3:22pm ·
THE PRIME MINISTER
MR LEE HSIEN LOONG
"EITHER SINGAPOREANS PRODUCE MORE KIDS OR WE MUST BRING IN MORE OUTSIDERS TO BECOME CITIZENS" need not be the only options available to us. As the Government invite the people to think deeper into this and other issues raised at the PM's National Day Rally, we should also look into other possibilities.

Many countries, including the middle east, have been employing foreigners for decades now, and yet all or most of them remain foreigners on work passes. In some countries, the foreigners far outnumber the locals. They are there strictly for professional and economic reasons.

As they grow older, these workers (from cleaners to construction workers to executives, engineers, bankers & more), will go back to their respective countries. They are then replaced by newer workers. And life goes on. Almost no foreigners became localised or given citizenships because it carries certain responsibilities, rights & benefits AND THESE ARE RESERVED FOR LOCALS ONLY.

Locals are represented in their government service, the private sector as well as employed by many enterprises that set-up shops in Dubai, Qatar, Saudi, Bahrain, Kuwait, Jordan, etc. And locals seldom feel threatened by the presence of foreigners. Their interest are looked after by their governments.

There is something in the way they did it that can be studied and considered for Singapore. Here are
some examples:

(i) Qatar. Out of the total population of approximately 1.7 million (2011 est.), the make up of ethnic groups is as follows: Qatari (Arab) 20%; other Arab 20%; Indian 20%; Filipino 10%; Nepali 13%; Pakistani 7%; Sri Lankan 5%; other 5%. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Qatar#Demographic)

(ii) In 2010, the UAE's population was 8.2m, of whom only 13% were UAE nationals or Emiratis. Majority of the population were expatriates. Many expatriates have been demanding citizenship but there is no naturalisation process in the UAE. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/UAE#Demographics)

(iii) BAHRAIN with land size almost like Singapore, has a  population of 1.2 million in 2010, of which 568,399 were Bahraini and 666,172 were non-nationals (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bahrain#Demographics)

(iv)  KUWAIT - population 3 million, with about 2 million non-nationals. Kuwaiti citizens are a minority. The government rarely grants citizenship to foreigners to maintain status quo. In 2008, 68.4% of the population consisted of expatriates, making the country the 4th highest ratio of expatriates of the world. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kuwait#Demographics)

In our case, some of the best can become citizens, maybe as PRs first. If they stay long enough, got married and have children, then they can be considered for citizenship as the children are born here.

There is no serious need to give citizenship to so many as we have done the past few years. Lets not forget, those who became citizens early in their working life, will face similar issues to deal with, just like other Singaporeans, and they may end up not marrying or having a very small family. And we will be back to square one. By then they already have citizenship rights.    

If we can keep most foreigners as PRs or work passes, the financial burden on the government will also not increase so much more as we add services for families and the elderly. Therefore the need to increase taxes or GST will be limited.

Like in the middle east, Singapore citizens also get regular handouts from the government, sharing some of the economic surplus dished out during the annual budget. It has been very useful for the lower income group. If we are strict in granting new citizenship, the size of the handouts and other welfare budget will not increase so much.

Singaporeans whose families have been here since before & after the 2nd world war, and since before and after the independence of Malaya (1957), as part of Malaysia (1963) and then independent Singapore (1965) have at least some common short history together as one people.

In the 1960s to the 1980s, as we embarked on economic development programme, people were asked to make early sacrifices for the sake of the country. One of which is when the Government acquired their land at around $1 psf for economic purposes.

Most villages were torn down and the established communities were dissolved. People were uprooted from their villages and moved to housing estates. Everyone had to adjust to new surroundings.

My village head used to own a 50-acre coconut plantation. We were all moved to Toa Payoh, Hougang, Kallang and Whampoa. We still stayed in touch. I met the children of the village head recently. They are mostly taxi drivers, property agents & hawkers.
 
They had to struggle hard to make a living and could only imagine what it would be like if their land (estimated to be worth a few  billion dollars today)  had remained with the family.

There are many other stories of locals working with the Government to ensure Singapore's survival as the future looked very uncertain in 1960s. We all felt that we were all in ONE TEAM, as if everyone were looking after each other and have a greater common interest in mind. The government was seen as very caring and the people responded accordingly.

Back then we rode on Democratic-Socialist values - a mix of democracy with some essence of socialism that allowed us to come up with pro-people national policies - cheap education, housing, medical care and welfare assistance for the needy. We even erected stand pipes in villages.

I think we were all poorer but somehow I could feel that THE SENSE OF UNITY WERE A LOT STRONGER. This include the SENSE OF BELONGING and TEAM SPIRIT between the people and the government. It felt like we were all ONE BIG MULTI-RACIAL FAMILY. We moved as one, act as one - all for the good of the people and the nation.

Today we are so much richer - one of the richest country by per capita income. But I am not sure if the SENSE OF UNITY, SENSE OF PURPOSE & NATIONAL TEAM SPIRIT between the people and the Government have all become stronger. I suspect it has not grown stronger. Not everyone is doing as well. Not everyone earns as much as the per capita income number. But property prices had skyrocketed.

Naturally with one of the highest income in the world,  our cost of living here is also one of the highest. Everyone understand this. But I cant say that THE SPECIAL FEELING OF BEING ONE BIG SINGAPORE FAMILY STRUGGLING TOGETHER FOR THE COMMON GOOD is still there. Maybe not as strong as it used to be. Although it should have become stronger.

And I suspect the newer development motto of Singapore Inc - CAPITALISM - had a lot to do with this situation. Capitalism, in extreme and especially as it is advocated in America, means to each his own. You do well, you enjoy your good life (even to the extreme). If you don't do well, that's too bad. Its your own fate or fault.

While some argued that capitalism will also bring out some good in people and the nation, I worry it will bring about some serious social problem. It can weaken, even tear, the fabric of our society. We may end up with a class society - the super rich, the rich, the upper-middle income, lower middle and the lower class -  the ordinary folks.

The problem is, under such a system, everything will be priced according 'to the market value' - be it housing, medical care, food etc. And such prices are easily affordable by the richer people in our society. The not so rich will face problems.

For example, in 1971 when my family moved to Toa payoh, my father could only afford a 3-room flat. The price was $6,800. While his salary was so small, he had no problem to service the loan. While most people today are earning many times more than my late father's generation then, they will not feel as easy to own and service the loan of a 3-room flat. The price has gone up like 30 times.
     
Somehow this and many more experiences of our people, has eroded the sense of 'being cared' by the Government. More people felt they had to struggle on their own all their lives, beginning at kindergarten age, in order to have a life here.

And today, with so many 'new citizens' included, whatever surpluses and economic benefits through Government 'giveaways' had to be shared with all the 'new Singaporeans'. More people sharing the same cake.

But they, their fathers and grandparents, were not here then in our poorer days. Back then our parents and grandparents had to make sacrifices (land, home, kampungs etc) and sweat it out for our families, the people and the country.

This will forever mark the difference between the original citizens of Singapore and the newbies.
 
Will the capitalist system that the Government adopted and the big jump in demographic changes that has occurred the past few years create a wider gap between the people and government? Will we end up with LESSER UNITY AS ONE NATION, ONE PEOPLE? I feel it has happened. I just hope it wont get worst.

If we are to move ahead stronger and more united, I think the Government need to study these carefully and make the necessary move to RE-UNITE THE NATION, so that we can all MOVE AS ONE again. I doubt we are.

It has become more fashionable these days for people to disagree with the government. That is to be expected as the people becomes more educated and discerning.

The more worrying trend is, many more people than before simply disagree with everything that the Government does. They even criticise good government efforts. But why? For them, its like there is no more trust left. They have entered a mode of less trusting the government.

It's sad if we end-up a more fractious society with the people looking at the Government far differently than the earlier generation used to. Whatever has happened since about a decade ago, must have caused some hurt in the hearts and minds of the people. It caused a rift to occur. We need to do something to address and heal this.

The key to this healing is to BUILD TRUST between the people and the government. Otherwise, a DISUNITED Singapore, is not at all good for this little red dot's future.
 

regards
Maidin Packer, Singapore
cc: Ministers Yaacob Ibrahim (Mica) & Heng Swee Keat (MOE)

How to Boost Male Hormone Levels

Random stuff i read at 6am in the morning.. This article is godlike. Love itttt.

How to Boost Male Hormone Levels

By Mack LeMouse | Mens Health | Rating:

 

In recent decades what it means to be a man has been changing. 'Metrosexuals' are the new cool guys, and it is considered being in touch with your feminine side and comfortable with your sexuality if you file your nails and straighten your hair. The guys women find attractive in the cinema are 'Edward Cullen' and other skinny men without an ounce of muscle on them. It gets to the point where even you and I find ourselves in dance classes instead of the gym.

There are many reasons for this. The women's liberation is often cited as one, with women gaining a more prominent role in society. Another is probably the media – which affects this fact as it starts to cater for women who have just as much money to take to the cinema as men. Finally another theory often postulated is that there is actually oestrogen – the female hormone – in our water. This then would actually be making men more feminine directly. So how can you go about increasing your male hormones and restore the balance a little?

Fortunately there are quite a few things that can increase your male hormones and specifically your testosterone and these all revolve around your diet and your lifestyle. There are many foods and supplements that can help your body to produce extra testosterone naturally for instance. For example if you eat red meats they will help you to produce extra testosterone, giving you one more excuse to eat steak. Likewise the herb 'tribulis terrestris' can also increase your natural production and is found in a number of supplements aimed at increasing testosterone. A range of other supplements also include a number of testosterone boosting herbs and ingredients including Oxcat, ZMA and more. These work to varying degrees however and the noticeable difference when taking these in either supplement or raw form is minimal. At the same time you should also avoid eating things that either contain oestrogen or increase your body's natural production of oestrogen. Among these is most notably celery that can decrease your natural production as a result. Similarly as the water is said to now contain oestrogen (as a result of women disposing of their own supplements and… tissues…) you might do well to avoid drinking tap water where possible and to instead drink bottled water or another drink. This is a bit expensive however of course so is only really advisable for those who are very serious about changing their hormone levels.

Fortunately there are other more simple ways to increase your testosterone that do have a more profound effect. One of these is to simply work out more, which will create all kinds of hormonal changes in your body and all of which will cause you to be more masculine. While this will increase testosterone levels through the link with muscle (lifting heavy for fewer reps to build mass rather than to improve definition is supposed to be the best way to increase 'T'), it will also create more growth hormone which is not technically a male hormone but has many of the same effects causing you to build more muscle, lose more fat and feel more powerful and energetic. It also causes the production of many so-called 'happiness' hormones which act like natural anti-depressants and leave you feeling more positive and energetic. Interestingly testosterone is also increased indirectly by exercise – as losing weight can also lower oestrogen levels in the body.

Another activity that can cause you to produce more testosterone is to have more sexual activity. The main form of this of course is just sex which again causes a range of chemical changes in the body, but studies have also shown masturbation to increase testosterone too – which to the brain is very similar to sex. The studies, granted, only showed a 'spike' in testosterone levels when the men masturbated, but then that testosterone has to go somewhere. Having sex in the morning (and theoretically masturbating in the morning) has been shown to drive up our hormone levels for the rest of the day).

As any woman knows the only time a man does not want sex is when he is too tired. This is not only because it is too much effort though, but also because tiredness is a sure fire way to kill testosterone levels. Finally aggression has also been shown to be linked with testosterone. While the assumption is that testosterone causes aggression, the reality is that it is a two way thing and anything your body does regularly it gets better at. This is not an excuse to go out starting bar fights, so instead try playing shoot 'em ups and beat 'em ups on the Xbox, or watching a violent film which will also increase your heart rate temporarily.

In short then there are a lot of ways to increase your testosterone levels, and it is perhaps unsurprising that most of these are behaviours that are considered typically male; eating red meat, lifting weights, sleeping, shouting at the screen while shooting things and having lots of sex. In turn you can expect to feel the benefits of that testosterone – increased drive, energy, sexual performance, muscle tone and weight loss. There is nothing wrong with being in touch with your feminine side and in fact it is very beneficial, but at the same time we should not be afraid of being men either, and it can even be bad for us to do so. Now go and cook up a steak and book tickets to see The Expendables.

Source: Health Guidance

i'm not a really religious person... but this is good.

A Religion Professor named Dr. Christianson taught a required survey of Christianity course at small college. Every freshman was required to take the course regardless of his or her major. Although he tried hard to communicate the gospel, students viewed the class as nothing more than a waste of time. 

One particular year Dr. Christianson had a student named Steve. Steve was the Center for the college football team and also a strong Christian who intended on going to Seminary. One day Dr. Christianson had an idea and he asked Steve to stay after class. "How many push-ups can you do?" He asked. Steve said, "I do 200 every night." The professor asked Steve if he could do 300. "I have never done 300 before" Steve said, "but I think I can do it." "Good," the professor said, and he proceeded to tell his plan to Steve. 

Friday came and Steve got to class early. Dr. Christianson came in with a large box of fluffy, cream filled doughnuts. The class was excited, it was Friday the last class of the day, and they could start their weekend early. Dr. Christianson went to the first girl in the row and asked, "Cynthia would you like a donut?" "Yes," she said. Dr. Christianson then turned to Steve and asked, "Steve would you do ten push-ups so that Cynthia can have a donut?" "Sure." Steve jumped down out of his desk and counted off ten push-ups. Dr. Christianson laid the donut on Cynthia’s desk. Joe was next. He asked Joe the same question and Joe said "yes." Steve did 10 more pushups and the professor laid the doughnut on Joe’s desk. And so it went all the way down the first row and half way down the second until it came to Scott. He was a basketball player and friendly to female companionship. Scott replied to the professor’s question by saying, "I want the doughnut if I can do my own push-ups." Dr. Christianson said, "No Steve has to do the pushups." Then Scott said, "Well I don’t want one if I can’t do my own." Dr. Christian turned around and asked, "Steve, would you do ten push-ups so Scoot can have a donut he doesn’t want." Scott said, "Hey! I said I didn’t want one!" Dr. Christianson said, "Look, this is my classroom, my class, my desks, and these are my donuts, Just leave it on the desk if you don’t want it." And he put the donut on Scott’s desk. 

Steve had begun to slow down a little and sweat had begun to form on his cheeks. Dr. Christianson started down the third row. Students were beginning to get a little angry. Dr. Christianson asked Jenny, "Jenny, do you want a donut?" Sternly, Jenny said, "NO!" Then Dr. Christianson asked, "Steve, would you do ten more push-ups so Jenny can have a donut that she doesn’t want?" Steve did ten-Jenny got a doughnut.

By now a sense of uneasiness had filled the room. The students were all beginning to say "no." There were uneaten donuts on every desk. Steve was now putting forth a lot of extra effort to get the pushups done for each doughnut. A small pool of sweat was on the floor, his face was red, and you could see the sweat soaking through his shirt. 

Dr. Christianson asked Robert, the most vocal unbeliever in class, to watch to make sure Steve did the full ten. Dr. Christianson started down the fourth row. Students from other classes had come in and were sitting along the side of the room watching on. When the professor saw them he counted and saw that there were now 34 people in the room. He was worried about Steve, "Could he do that many push-ups?" Jason, a recent transfer student, didn’t know what was going on and came in to see. The class yelled, "Go away! Don’t come in!" Steve picked up his head and said, "Let him come in." Jason was asked and he said "yes." "Steve will you do ten push-ups so Jason can have a donut?" Steve did ten pushups very slowly and with great struggle. Jason, confused, was handed a donut and he sat down. Dr. Christianson then finished the fourth row and began on the visitors. Steve’s arms were shaking uncontrollably with each push up. By this time sweat was pouring off of his face and arms. The very last two students were cheerleaders. "Linda, do you want a donut?" Linda cried and said, "No thank you." Professor turned to Steve, "Steve would you do ten push-ups so Linda can have a donut she doesn’t want?" Grunting from the effort, Steve did ten very slow push-ups for Linda. The last girl was Susan. "Susan would you like a donut?" Susan was full of tears and did not answer. "Steve, would you do ten push-ups so Susan can have a donut?" Susan asked, "Dr. Christianson why can’t I help him?" Dr. Christianson had tears in his eyes also and replied, "I have given him this task and he is in charge of seeing that everyone has an opportunity for a donut whether they want it or not. When I decided to have a party I looked at the grade book and found that Steve was the only person with a perfect grade. All of you had failed a test, skipped class, or turned in inferior work. Steve told me that in football practice, when a player messes up he must do push-ups. I told Steve that none of you could come to my party unless he paid the price by doing your push-ups. He and I made a deal for your sakes."

Steve slowly got up off the floor; he had done 350 push-ups, his arms buckled beneath him as he started to get up. Two students helped Steve up off the floor and to a seat, physically exhausted, but wearing a thin smile. "Well done good and faithful servant", said the professor, "not all sermons are preached in words class." Turning to the students the professor said, "My wish is that you may fully comprehend all the riches of grace and mercy that have been given to you through the sacrifice of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. God did not spare His only Son but gave him up for all of us. Whether or not we accept His gift is our choice. The price has been paid. Wouldn’t you be foolish and ungrateful to leave it lying on the desk?

The Relationship Charts.

Ok so this Singaporean Dude named Tommy Wee has this awesome blog and i follow him on twitter. His posts are always damn quirky. But this blog post was seriously something i couldn't try to put in words no matter how i tried. So i'm literally gonna reblog it here:

Diagrams To Understand Your Problems.

So I keep seeing hashtags on Twitter about Girlfriends, Boyfriends, Exes and I’ve decided that people fixate on perfectly selfish reasons to COMPLAIN. I complain too, but I like to see it as getting something off my hairless chest.

But seriously, people whine so much about relationships that I’m usually prompted to ask: “Dear Whoever, you can date anyone you want, but why do I have to hear about how tough it is?” I don’t whine about my uneven tan lines to you right?

Tweeting your problems helps release them. They’re like brain farts. I tweet it, and it’s over. I don’t give a rat’s ass about it afterwards. If you read it and get offended, then it’s like voluntarily STANDING IN FART. That’s not very smart, yo. Farts are not like gas leaks in the house. You don’t go sniffing out the source.

ANYWAY, tweeting is cathartic. Not that I’m Catholic, but I think it works much better than a priest breathing heavily in the shrouded cubicle next door. Speaking of which, I’m starting to feel like one of them burdened souls.

Because I get a lot of questions about Men/Women issues, especially, “How  would A Last Alpha Male deal with these problems”-type questions, I’ve helpfully scoured the Internet for meaningful charts to help you understand the opposite sex better. They work like the Periodic Table of Elements for Chemistry students, or the profit-and-loss charts of Koi Bubble Tea. (All profit, just starch at the bottom. No loss.)

The problems with Dudes & Chicks can be summed up with these two wonderful diagrams.

I like this Fifth Colour green. It's perfect for eye-shadow if SIA decides to update the make-up of the Singapore Girl.

What This Chart Tells ME about Boys:

1) Gay men love to be the centre of attention. And because they embody so much of other boyish qualities, masculine and not-so-masculine, they’re very complex creatures. If you’ve ever been to the wrong parts of Chinatown and Neil Road after 1am, you’ll see that the finding that ALL gay men are handsome, smart and nice is wrong.

2) Handsome boys prefer to be on top.

3) Nerds are like the anuses of the world. Everyone needs one.

4) Three circles squashed together look pretty.

5) Smart, Handsome Men have to be either an asshole, or gay. That’s a huge sweeping statement which also means this chart was drawn up by a bitter, jilted addicted-to-Chanel bitch who became a fag hag after her Wall Street Prince Charming dumped her whiny, high-maintenance ass.

NOW THIS:

If you focus your eyes at these three balls and concentrate hard enough, you'd realise after 5 minutes, "What the HELL AM I DOING THIS FOR??"

What This Chart Tells ME About Girls:

1) Since they’re always in the middle, the ONES WHO ONLY DATE ASSHOLES get all the action.

2) If you’re a Smart, Nice Girl, then you get the fugly brown colour. I would also replace the word ‘Idiot’ with ‘Boring’ but what do I know right?

3) Unlike the Boy Chart, which proudly displays the term, ‘GAY’, girls don’t understand the term ‘LESBIANS’. Because the state of Lesbianism is not a permanent state. Most of them go back straight after they realise they’re missing a major human appendage of joy. The word rhymes with ROCK.

4) The creator of this chart – most probably female and clueless – also forget to include names for female versions of ‘ASSHOLE’ and ‘NERD’. For which I’ll helpfully substitute with ‘BITCH’ and ‘SPINSTER’.

5) This chart was most definitely drawn up by a girl because she doesn’t hate herself enough to come up with more colourful language.

So there you have it. Charts that explain all your relationship problems at a glance. Oh wait, there’s one more to help you understand simple, low-expectations, easy-to-please men much better.

Good design is a lot like clear thinking made visual. — Edward Tufte

Top Five Regrets

By Bronnie Ware For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives. People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learned never to underestimate someone's capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them. When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:  1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.  2. I wish I didn't work so hard This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence. By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.  3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result. We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.  4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying. It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships. 5. I wish that I had let myself be happier This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again. When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Life is a choice. It is YOUR life.
Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly.
Choose happiness.

PERCEPTION

PERCEPTION
. .. . Something To Think About . . ..THE SITUATION
In Washington , DC , at a Metro Station, on a cold January morning in 2007, this man with a violin played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time, approximately 2,000 people went through the station, most of them on their way to work. After about 3 minutes, a middle-aged man noticed that there was a musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds, and then he hurried on to meet his schedule.

About 4 minutes later:

The violinist received his first dollar. A woman threw money in the hat and, without stopping, continued to walk.

At 6 minutes:

A young man leaned against the wall to listen to him, then looked at his watch and started to walk again.

At 10 minutes:
A 3-year old boy stopped, but his mother tugged him along hurriedly. The kid stopped to look at the violinist again, but the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk, turning his head the whole time. This action was repeated by several other children, but every parent - without exception - forced their children to move on quickly.

At 45 minutes:

The musician played continuously. Only 6 people stopped and listened for a short while. About 20 gave money but continued to walk at their normal pace. The man collected a total of $32.
After 1 hour:
He finished playing and silence took over. No one noticed and no one applauded. There was no recognition at all.
No one knew this, but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the greatest musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written, with a violin worth $3.5 million dollars. Two days before, Joshua Bell sold-out a theater in Boston where the seats averaged $200 each to sit and listen to him play the same music.


This is a true story. Joshua Bell, playing incognito in the D.C. Metro Station, was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste and people's priorities.
This experiment raised several questions:

*In a common-place environment, at an inappropriate hour, do we perceive beauty?

*If so, do we stop to appreciate it?

*Do we recognize talent in an unexpected context?
One possible conclusion reached from this experiment could be this: 
If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world, playing some of the finest music ever written, with one of the most beautiful instruments ever made . . .
How many other things are we missing as we rush

through life?

Say it ain't true.

Pisces Men

He is very emotional and always allows himself to be very emotional. He can have good night sleep and be in a good mood, and less than few hours at work he can be very moody. He does not understand things or try to understand things easily. If you notice him carefully, you will notice what kind of moods he is in. He is a thinker and able to do well at work and always succeed.

His normal gestures mean he always looks at other people faults, but he will not talk about it. He has the ability to know your thought and able to tell you what you are thinking about. He can mostly memorize all his anger, his loves. They are his important secrets and he will keep them to himself and will never let you know.

He is not a very ambition man and careless about his position in society. Wealth does not draw his attention, because he is not greedy man and as well he thinks money is not something that will last. He could be very careless about his future. He does not like to fight against all odds, but instead following the stream and make life easier.

Sometimes he likes to take an easy path, which causes him very unsteady future. He is kind and slightly lazy, but it is his cute character. He hates rules and regulations. He will never look down on people. He is a polite guy and can be very aggressive when he is mad.

He loves to think that he lives in a beautiful world and surround by nice people, so if he finds his world is cruel and not what he expects, he will live in his world instead. His other charm is that he is a funny guy, and it is his real weapon. He can tease you and yet make it looks like one of his joke. Even when he is sad, he still has that funny face, so you could hardly tell if he is mad or depress.

He likes to hide his feeling and help other people especially those who need friend or lonely. He will be everything that you want and everything you do not want. He has a chance to make it as much as a chance to fail. He can determine to make it work and can do it well, except he tends to lost his energy with other important things, that’s how he miss many of his good opportunity.

He can be happy and content by himself. What he thinks is important is not “Love”, but firm status and stability. He has plenty of love for you. He is a good speaker, as much as he is a good listener. When he is with you, he wants to be happy. He understands his partner’s emotional. He likes to take a long rest and sometimes being alone.

If he needs to be alone, try not to disturb him. He is a sensitive, quiet, shy and easily hurt. He wants to feel worthy. He can be mad and noisy, but once he calm down, he will be that happy person again. He is not a jealous or possessive guy, and if he feels jealous he will hide it. He has many friends of both sex, and he care about his friends.

He likes to have lots of friends, so you can not get jealous or else you will loose him. He likes beautiful things, so if a pretty woman walks by he will look, so do not get mad at him knowing this fact. When he is lonely or feeling sad, is close to comfort him. He does not like to take advice, so if you want him to listen or to follow your advice; you have to act as a good sample for him first.

He likes a cheery and a smart woman. If you treat him like he is your special person, then he will be that special person for you. He will trust you if he is in love but try not to over doing it and spoil him too much. You have to know yourself worth all the time too.

If reading me is like reading an open book, then this post will be my opened book. Take your time to read me.