Fireworks.

I want to play with fire crackers.


Just once.


Make it a reality.


Cos i wanna live my life with no regrets.


Sad. I'll guess Katy Perry will suffice for now.

Shhhh.

Secrets.


Today cny reunion dinner. Finally over. aiks monkey hell lose so much money. My dad cheer me up by saying havn't rabbit year yet so still got hope . LOL.

Haha D3!! Should have put the crispy thing last ! LOL damn fail our yu sheng. HAHA.


Anyway during dinner i found out some stuff about my family. Omo damn stupid . Its like secretssss. Haiz. An epiphany that my family damn weird. The women r crazy and the men r slowly becoming crazy.

Whats the point of keeping a secret?
An information that, once shared, could change an outcome temporary or permanently. There are 4 different outcomes when one has a secret:

1. U share it,
2. U don't share it.
3. U sub-consciously share it.
4. U share it indirectly. (transmission of information)

So 1: If u share it, the other person can :

• share it with others
• keep it and do something about it.
• keep it and not do anything.

(I'll talk abt this later)

If 2: Nth happens.

If 3: U're an idiot. Or u're a genius.

If 4: Too bad, u shared it with someone who has a vagina mouth.

ok for number 1... let's say u're the sharer... U wanna share cos u wanna listening ear, or either u wan the listener to actually help u. 

So.

Is the person listening obligated to help the other person? Or just to lend an ear? This is wad i wanna know..

Cos it seems if u're just a lending ear, nth will happen. And by that, u're a redundant soul . (ok maybe its good cos u let the other person let out some steam.) But honestly, when the person tells u so much and u dun do a thing.. It's quite useless. (ok, cos i feel that sharing a secret means a closer bonding.) But if u dun do a shit, i dun see any bonding.. so its a bit redundant if u ask me. Cos i've been there.. and it seems the other person who actually did smt became closer to the speaker. So yeah. I've made my point.

Haiz. Ok.. Those of u.. if u wanna keep a freaking secret, then just keep it. Dun go giving those kinda hints n clues. I am down there and u're speaking all those hints n stuff i end up guess ur secret .. which is freaking irritating. COS IF I GUESS IT AND U DUNNO THAT I KNOW THEN WHATS THE POINT OF KNOWING IF I KNOW AND U DUNNO I KNOW? like.. GEEZZZ MAN.  And ur secret is not even cool lah. Brr.. irritating.
The less i know about u, the more i know you.


Shocks that so many of U GUYS read my blog. Eh really meh? brr i was expecting only 2 ppl to read this blog nia. Anyway orientation guys.. This blog is my emo corner so u read liao u'll only be emo .. so dun read bah. it's more safe.
SBS sia.


Somewhere Only We Know - Keane 
xoxo.♥

hurt.

Fuck it still hurts like hell..

It's so hard to forget. Guess it's too hard to forgive myself. 

 i cannot forgive myself for all the things i've done.. it felt so stupid thinking about it. All the actions i've put you through.. all those memories i've incurred in you... why did a foolishness of a fucking idiot come eradicate a portion of your youth.. and that fucking idiot is me. I shouldn't have done all those stupid things.. I knew i would already get hurt time and again. I've become so numb after a while i didn't even bother anymore.. I guess it only made u stronger.. now u're with someone who cares for you most probably even more than i do . whatever happens now can only be my fault. the agony i am feeling is only my fault. just seeing ur name already pains me to the core . n seeing the other guy consistently flirting with u and vice-versa.. fuck i really wanna kill myself. why must i be so dumb. falling into this old trap time and again.. ysd from ch point of view it is that if ur "% of getting that girl is high then u'll only try. If the girl doesn't dislike u nor avoid u" yeah that's all a fucking big lie.

Love has no equation. There is no formula in finding your perfect one. 

 IF the right one comes, she'll come. I will only wait for love till it finds me.. i've told myself that phrase a thousand times each n every time after getting hurt. but the stupidity of my fucking hormones are always interfering with my thoughts. "Don't think, just do." like what Barney would say.. see what happened? It only got people hurt.

Your heart and your mind are the only 2 most important things in your life that will constantly fight over you. But know this: that they'll always be with you till u die.

 fuck this serious. Just seeing u go comment on his wall already make me so fucking sad already. ok even though we're friends doesn't mean i can tell u what to do.. Maybe i've done the same i dunno. and this is ur answer of revenge. I know u might not mean it but it happens. Like if i were to do the same shit that pisses u off as well as u would do to me then everything will be purely coincidental cos i know our friendship is not based on such nonsense
fuck u . don't type like how she always type .. it is fucking disgusting.. 

The more u know, the more memories. Thus when it all goes away, the more u have to forget. You'll only get more hurt in the end. 

ysd journey for a smoke and a drink was really something. 2nd time going back clark quay. 1st time was during samsung event. which was also the 1st time i went out with her.... Talking about how the class is slowly being so fucked up really is quite stupid. I'd known this fact since starting of Sem 2. Guessed everyone said that it wasn't 'that obvious" was obviously a bunch of crap.
THE ONLY REASON U DON'T FEEL IT COS IT DID NOT HAPPEN TO U.

never feel the hatred of a hater. Cos if u do, you'll start hating and the hater will just start mocking how hypocritical u r.

well maybe i'm the hater. Ironic. I am the class leader and i am saying this. Maybe i know too much. Maybe i know too little. Doesn't matter. Information is only key if used correctly. But the knowledge gain will only hurt someone or has already done so. I have to know. I need to know. I want to know. so which of these is the correct answer? My stupid obnoxious-self would most probably say it's the 'want to know.' since i am so fucking obnoxious . Screw it .
Maybe u guys didn't realise it. All this futile "silent" squabbles aren't that "silent" . They are so loud , ringing in the eyes technology and everywhere else, that it could make some fat guy shake violently as he were to eat KFC during suppers. Come on.... ok fine maybe i am not 'inside' the 'war zone' cos i am in dance and u guys r all fighting to be in wadever clubs u all wanna be. So i am an outsider looking in. The accuser is so ironic as u had a perfect cca beforehand and dropped out midway. Now scavenging. We thought u were those kinda person that wouldn't care about competition. Wow that post really made us quite shock u know? I am not one to judge. But i guess its a volcano that will eventually erupt.... And i applaud you for that. Ur point of generalisation viewing has shunned the party that u had/not planned to has worked out marvelously. The past week had been awkward till the extend of barely speaking and cold shoulder-ness. Ok Most probably u didnt mean it. U're not that kinda person. I know that. I could swear by it. But now that things has happened for the worse. He has been constantly dragging the closest of friend away from the rest such that it has become so awkward, as such, everyone agrees, most silently, some, bluntly.

 talking this much of bullshit. Guess no one even realised that maybe once year 2 is over, everyone will go their separate ways and regret all of their actions?
the ironic part is that it could go either way..well there's still 365 more days. who knows? Maybe everyone will gut out each other's throats even before we get there. haha. That WILL be the day man.
"Social Dynamics" as my ex vice principal would describe it. Applied to our class, for now.

Talking about my sec sch vice principal really make me miss sec sch. It was quite different.. If anyone had a problem , we would all 'settle' it straight den.. like literally fight it out.. sometimes some were too delicate of an issue to fight it out. Ended up no one bothered. The true friends remain as friends and the fuckers would be shunned. HAHA now the fucker has returned!! Fucking dog comes back to haunt us with his fucking attics again. Thank goodness i'm forgiving. I'll fucking cycle to his 15storey's and ripe his fucking "big" muscles out like a dog savaging leftover meat from a dead beggar left on the roads of NY I<3U. LOL i love the sound of that.

Whew guess i've covered everything that has been in my mind. well at least it made me feel better.
I know u're reading this... keep it to urself about the class issues cos it'll only get worse and worse
<3

Everyday good day and happy day. 

Words i speak only through my lips, 

The breaths touching the ever bright sky, 

Would only make the children cry.

Cos the words i've spoken,

Is for those that is broken.

At least i know in my heart,

That those i have amended, 

Will now not be as broken. 

The only sad truth is that, 

The only one still broken, 

Is me.